Today, one of my bumpy fingernails peeled completely off. I’m not posting photos of it because it makes me throw up in my mouth a little just thinking about it.
The good news is, a cleaning lady came over and cleaned my floors and kitchen today, and now my house smells clean. She even scrubbed out the cat barf from the carpet. My approach to cat barf: cover with a rag and hope the liquid gets absorbed. It looks like that worked, because hey! no stains!
Had I cleaned, my house would smell like bleach. She and I exchanged drunk stories. She just turned 21, and thought I was in my early 20s. Big. Fat. Grin on my wrinkly, oxygen mask-chafed face. I have to alternate between Proactiv’s refining mask to make it less pimply and neosporin to make it less red and infected. I don’t know how people with cold sores cope.
I will be forever glad that I have so far managed at avoid the herpes. I can’t imagine the herpes would be pleasant, as the name implies snake bites. When Mati was little, I taught her the Valtrex theme song, and she was so cute running around in her ruffly little dresses singing, “Living the liiife I waaaant” in her little falsetto. Then she’d yell, “THANKS, VALTREX!”
You’ll notice in the photo below that the angel is putting these kids in the paths of many dangers. They could “accidentally” jump or fall off the cliff, fall face-down into running water, or get bitten by a snake. Three points for effort, you naughty angel! Three points for trying. Better luck next time.
